Posts tagged ‘play’

Make ’em Laugh

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.ne

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I had my first improv class tonight at the Comedy Shrine, and I loved it, as I knew I would. I was a little nervous, sure, but I knew this is what I wanted to do. I thought I’d be a little better at it than I was, but I did pretty well for a newbie, and I had an absolute blast. I wish I could do this every day! I think the teacher summed it up best when he said: “This is your chance to play.” (I get to play!!)

I’ve always known that I was a performer — from my wonderfully nasty imitation of Cinderella’s stepmother in grade school to clarinet and vocal solos and musical theater as an adult — but I never pursued it.  Part of it was not being able to find my niche, but part of it was believing what I’d always heard: artists are broke, they have to sell their soul to get anywhere, they are naturally gifted/super beautiful (a lot more talented than I could ever be),  etc etc

But I am meant to be involved in something creative, and I’m pretty sure performing is part of it.  I love being on that stage.  I love those lights.  I love the audience.  I love forgetting about the rest of the world and getting lost in that moment.  I want all of those things.

I’m already looking forward to next week.  I’m already working on my character development homework — right now I’m working on cheerleader, an over-emotional child, an under-emotional teen, and nerd or hippie girl — and I just spent a whole 10 minutes gabbing excitedly to Brian about everything from the awkward story game to my favorites: the  hitchhiker and freeze tag games.  And we have a fantastic group,  We still are a bit awkward, but we are already starting to gel.  I really like how our teacher described improv as a team.  We build on each other’s strengths and we bail each other out in time’s of weakness.

The happiness and fulfillment I’m feeling this evening make me think I may want to stick with my Coursera guitar class afterall. (I was feeling over-committed — as usual.)   Should I be crazy and fill every weekday evening with organized fun?  Classes up the wazoo?  Right now it sounds like an awesome idea. . . . but maybe I want to sleep on it first . . .   Sweet dreams!

Reflection on My Top 10

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

According to my metaphysics class, I’m not supposed to call this list the “Top 10”, but this is my blog, so nyah, nyah, nyah! 🙂 (Ego involved here?  Naah!)

Here are my Top 10 from my original post in the beginning of July:

1. Play time.  — Unchanged.

2. Art time — Still a need but combined with others numbers.

3. Sacred Space. — Unchanged.

4. $2500 a month.  — Made it once!  Something I am really struggling with; had to make an adjustment.

5. Enlightenment  – Would be great.  Quite a hefty goal!

6. Work clothes. — Not so much of a concern, but it does bother me that my clothes presently don’t fit right.

7. Etsy skirts – Got ’em!

8. Fish tank —  Got it!

9. Mortgage paid —  Unchanged but reworded.

10. Bike 100 miles (in one day). —  Did it!

Here are my newbies/repeats:

1. Awareness of my thoughts; changing negative affirmations to positive ones

2. Fulfilling work

3. Time and abundance.

4. Play

5. Debt-Free

6. Experiencing Light and Bringing Light

7. Finished basement.

8. Sacred Space.

9. Being in a band

10. Dance

These might take a little longer to accomplish, but they are what I really want.  Time to go meditate, visualize, and concentrate before I fall asleep!

10 Most Wanted List

IMG_0176Part of my exercises for The School of Metaphysics education include a “10 Most Wanted” list of things that I really want for myself.  This list can fluctuate (as the person changes), but this is what I have right now and how I’m progressing on each one:

These are numbered by importance, starting with #1 as most important.

1. Play time. This one has been the most difficult for me and the one I want the most.  I’m always thinking about what I need to do work-wise, and I’m not giving myself enough time to play.  I’ve found that I even try to structure my playtime!  But what’s helping is noticing ways that I “play” throughout the day that I may not even have been aware of.  I heard from somewhere that I need to play more with little children.  I think that’s true.  I also think I need to just sit down and rock out old school with some coloring books and My Little Ponies, partying like it’s 1985.

2. Art time. Ah, just as elusive.  And this one I tend to structure.  I’m still technically taking that art class from Coursera, but I’ve danced around it because it seems like a huge time commitment and a lot of work.  My plan is to veer away from the structure of the class and just dabble.  Watch the videos that interest me and pick a project that feels doable and just PLAY.  Back to play again. 🙂  Notice I’ve given these two spots top priority.  And they are STILL a challenge.

3. Sacred Space. This means I’m trying to keep the spaces that I’m in looking nice, i.e. home, work, and car.  I started with my car and cleaned out everything extraneous — I left a basket/purse with tutoring stuff in there and my sunglasses — and then I dusted and vacuumed.  Much better.  Then I cleaned up the desk space at work where I tutor.  Much better.  The house has been more of a challenge.  I’ve reorganized the main floor space.  The kitchen table is now my official play and workspace.  My end table is organized with magazine holders.  The kitchen counter stays clean, the dishes are less out-of-control, and I’m keeping up with the litterbox on a daily basis.  My next big project is the office.  The floor of the office is clean, and my shelves are fine, but I’ve got to wade through all of my papers.  I want to go through old files and then file the new stuff.  I may have more paperwork to work with this year, so I want to make sure my organizational system is already in place.  And then there’s cleaning the rest of the house.  I need to come up with some system/habit to maintain overall cleanliness of the house: dusting, defurring, vacuuming, washing the kitchen floor, wiping down surfaces, washing the wood floor, vacuuming stairs and upstairs, cleaning the bathroom, sweeping the basement, etc.  And then there’s also the difficulty in sharing space and involving your partner in your efforts. . .

4. $2500 a month.  This one is the hardest one for me to even think about, and not just because I’m in the midst of transition and honing in on the job direction I’m actually taking next, but because I’m concerned that more money possibly = more work, and that conflicts with my numbers 1 and 2, and probably a lot of the rest of my list.  Regardless, I’m pretty tight with my budget right now — squeezed thin, really — and I want to be able to travel more, donate more, and generally do more of the things on my list.  So, I’m keeping my eyes on the prize, and dealing with the queasy feeling in my stomach.

5. Enlightenment. I feel that I am meant for something big.   I’m not sure what that is yet, but I want to make a huge difference.  I want to rock the socks of this world.  And now that I’m typing this, I feel like I’ve gotten off course.  BUT, they say that you can lead others by example (like St. Francis) So, I want to become enlightened so that others can also become enlightened.  And I’m doing this through the School of Metaphysics.  And also by trying not to multi-task, working on staying present.

6. Work clothes. I had a post some time ago about certain garments that were just not comfortable for me.  I have yet to solve that problem.  I have gotten some helpful advice that I eventually intend to follow-up on that will however inevitably end up costing great expense.  (See #4.)  Also, I’ve been wanting to go to Goodwill for sometime to beef up my spring work clothes.  My pants and skirts are sufficient (although I don’t like wearing the black pants.  I don’t know how, but black attracts 10 times as much cat fur as any other color.  Or else the other colors just camouflage it.  I shudder at the thought.)  But, anyway, most of my tops are long-sleeved.  And I don’t have a lot that will work with my skirts.  I also badly need a pair of summer shoes, but I will be forced to do some specific department store shopping for those because of my narrow, flat feet. (Again, see #4.)

7. Etsy skirts. My super awesome students/families from my previous employment gave me some generous gifts, so I finally used them to buy some Etsy skirts (which I feel more comfortable buying from than from department stores).  The skirts are gorgeous, and I’m super-excited. (I spent hours pouring over the site to pick the ones I liked best.)  So, you may think I should take this off my list, then, right?  I’ve decided I like having it on there.  It will take some time before the skirts actually make it to me anyway, and by that time I may be able to afford more! 🙂

8. Fish tank. One day when I walked into the pet store to get food and litter I saw a fish tank display and decided I wanted one.  I had a ten gallon back when I was a kid, and I really enjoyed having fish.  I actually cleared off our kitchen counter to make the perfect little spot for it under the cabinets (making it less accessible for the cats).  I’m thinking a 30-gallon tank will fit in there, so now I’m just waiting for the right opportunity.

9. Mortgage paid. I hate being in debt.  I suppose it’s fairly normal, but I still don’t think it’s ideal, so I want that mortgage paid off.  Circumstances aren’t the best for it right now, but I intend to get it done.

10. Bike 100 miles (in one day). I’m pretty excited about this one.  I put it low on my list because I won’t actually do it until September when I participate in the Door County Century.  However, I have a systematic plan to get there, and I’m already up to 38 miles in one day from when Brian and I biked yesterday.  (Last year I biked 70 miles in the Door County Century, so this goal is reasonable for me.)

So, these are my “10 Most Wanted.”  I keep the multicolored list on an index card in my purse and look at them at least once a day.  What would you put on your list?

Today’s Inspiration

 "Double Yellow Sunflowers" courtesy of nuttakit/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

“Double Yellow Sunflowers” courtesy of nuttakit/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

 

“I place fewer and fewer demands upon others, and especially myself.  I am free to commune with nature, work, play, read, or just do nothing.” – from Dr. Wayne W. Dyer’s Living the Wisdom of the Tao (75th verse)

I badly need this today!

I Can Be Happy? I Can!

I think I’ve been unhappy for so long that I forgot how to be happy.

Don’t get me wrong.  I don’t have a miserable life.  I have my basic needs met: food on the table, a roof over my head, clothes, transportation, etc  I’m not struggling for survival.  And I do fun things.  I’ve gone on trips, watched movies, read great books, been in a musical, and spent time with those I love.  But overall?  I’ve been unhappy.  Very much so.

I never felt like I knew what I wanted to do with my life, and after college I continued on a path that I felt I’d randomly chose, increasingly aimless, heart-less, listless, and eventually frustrated and depressed.

But I didn’t know I could do better, and I was afraid to try.

Until I had to.

Sometimes it takes hitting bottom to quit digging yourself deeper.  When I realized I was coming home depressed, stressed, and/or angry every day, I knew something had to change.  I am thankful for Shaklee, or I know I would have become sick.  And yet even that may not have been enough, but forces within my environment also began pushing me on.  And though I was upset, angry, and resistant to the changes at the time, I am ever so grateful now.

Because I’m beginning to find what happiness is.  For example, I think I actually like teaching.  People kept telling me that I just needed the right situation, that I truly am a teacher.  But I didn’t believe them.  I believed that I was awful, teaching was awful, and the half-hearted decision I’d made on my major those many years ago was awful.

How do I feel now?  Terribly nervous:  “Do I know what I’m doing?” “Can I handle so many different grades? “What will the students be like?” But I’m pleased to notice other feelings also emerging: excitement . . .  contentment.

Can I work and like it?  Yes!

And I can also play.

The little girl who danced around the house to the Nutcracker in her fluffy ballerina skirt now rocks it out to pop, rock, and latin tunes in her kitchen and living room.

The girl who started stories now journals, blogs, and still dreams.

And she’s finding some fun new things to explore, like meditation,  her intuition, and her artistic side.

So, this is the story of the girl who found what she was looking for.  She veered of the path and began to explore the forest.  The girl was scared — the forest was be dark — but then she began to see light through trees.

And then the girl was happy. . .

 

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