ID-100343100Please excuse my first public attempt at comedy.  It is funnily meant. 😉

It all starts with a dot.  Really.

I’m very amused (and sometime annoyed) by the disparity between what’s appropriate for women’s upper half and men’s upper half. . . It seems that because the substance of our pectorals protrudes a little further than that of men’s — Well, some of ours do . .  (and actually, some men’s do, really. . .) — we have to cover ourselves up, while men, for some reason, do not.

Or course, we have quite a lot of us rebels out there.  I applaud the tini  . . . and not so tini . .  and especially the teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikinis! that women don today, everything from the sports bra halter to the strings attached to bandaid sized mesh, the bare minimum for society’s requirements today.  “Men can bare their wares and not us?” they say.  “Well, maybe we both can have it our way!”

And what is the “way”, exactly?  It’s not really about the protrusion.  Not really.  It’s about covering up the dot.  Yes, the nipple.  I mean, think about it — what else could it be?  Because . . . the side boob is passable.  The cleavage is acceptable.  Is there even a word for the “underboob”? I think I’ve seen some of that, too!  So, what’s left?  The center.  The dot.  We cannot expose that part without consequences.

So, why must the female’s dot be covered and not the male’s, you ask?  It can’t be the protrusion beneath the dot — because some men have it, too!  Ah. . . it must be the function of the dot.  Something comes from the dot. (Milk!)  Perhaps we fear we will get squirted the face by an out of control milk nozzle!  Or perhaps we do not believe we have the self-control required to abstain from these glorious fountains of fat and protein!  Are the machines functioning?  Who cares?  We might try to find out, running like baby cows to their ready mothers.

That must be it.  Surely.  That is why many men (and women!) frown upon breastfeeding. We fear being tempted to join in with the baby!  Does it matter that native cultures have not had this problem?  No!  We are different!  We are special! Are you sure that it’s not that are horrified that these mothers don’t have the perfectly engineered/photoshopped/amazingly natural breasts like the ones on the billboards I drive by every day?  Of course not!  I mean, those nipples are covered! What was I thinking? It’s because of the dot!  The dot might be exposed!  Keep the dot covered!  What if the baby stops to take a breath?!  We will see it all!  What if the mom has to adjust her position and move the baby!  The dot!  Ay!  Avert your eyes!

I hope to have brought some dot-phobia awareness to you today, so that you are better able to understand and cope with this phenomenon in all its complexity.  And I hope we stop to pause when we are tempted to judge others on their dress codes and recognize that ours may be just as “wacky”!

Much love and many blessings to you all. ❤

Image courtesy of Viacheslav Blizniuk at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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