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“Rock Style Woman with Headphone” courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net 

1. Health – I’ve been back and forth on this one.  Losing some sleep because of karaoke; karaoke’s liquid diet is not so great for me either.  Besides karaoke and Easter candy, I’ve been faring fairly well.  I had a bit of ice cream for the first time at my friend’s house today, so I feel like I’ve officially fallen off the limited sugar horse for this week.  Exercise has been on and off.  I missed it today but got some Zumba in yesterday.

2. Creative Time/ Me Time — I think Game of Thrones would count for this.  Though today I was grading as I watched, the creativity of the show is still inspiring, even as I work.  Yesterday I was sucked into the living room couch void and didn’t feel like I got much work done nor explored my creativity.  I CANNOT do anything beyond TV watching in that room.  Nothing happens there.

3. People — I love the new karaoke crowd.  They are probably not people I would normally hang out with on a regular basis, but they seem down-to-earth, friendly, and fun.  I got to sing “It’s Your Love” — a Faith and Tim duet — with someone I barely knew from karaoke, and it was awesome.  (I also sang “Somewhere Out There” again with one of my regular karaoke buddies and some other songs solo.)

I visited one of my teacher friends again who just had twins.  Her daughters are seriously ridiculously adorable.  And they are still at the age where they like to be held, so that’s wonderful.  My friend and I are at pretty similar places in our lives (minus the twins), so I feel like we can relate to each other.  Spending part of the day with her today reminded me of how important it is to get out of the house.

4. Being in the Moment – I’ve felt a little less in the moment and in touch with myself the last two days.  But I have been in the moment enough to enjoy the simplicity of a baby’s life, to take note of my ranging emotions, and to observe my “stuckness” yesterday (when I couldn’t get myself to work nor play and sat paralyzed on the couch).  Maybe I can’t meditate for long periods of time, but I can feel the benefits of even centering myself for a moment.  Immediately I sigh, taking in a deep breath, which in itself is a blessing.

5. Life Purpose —I talked with Cindy, my coach, yesterday.  I had it set in my head that I was going to do retail.  I was going to start retail and find my way.  She asked me how I felt about it, and I was noticing a blob of depression sinking down my chest.  I told her I felt a bit depressed, and she asked me to go into it more, and I got choked up and could barely speak.  I told her that it felt like I was lost and I knew it would be a pay cut, and that things could be a struggle for us for a while.

I think my fear and Cindy’s concern is that I’ll get in a rut again, as I have with previous positions.  Retail is fine – and I remember that I’ve enjoyed working the cash register and interacting with customers in the past – and I may work it for a while, but it’s not my final destination.  And I need to keep working toward that final destination or I know my soul will cry out again.

So, Cindy brought up music therapy.  I’d considered it before.  I’d first become aware of the profession when I’d read the book Sing You Home by Jodi Picoult.  I wasn’t sure I could do what the protagonist was doing, but I was definitely intrigued.  I looked into the profession on-and-off, but wasn’t interested in learning music theory.  I’d never wanted to major or minor in music because of music theory, so I didn’t think I’d be interested now.

But I think I’m going to give it a shot.  I love music.  I love performing it; I love listening to it.  It moves me in a way that nothing else does.  I’m also very interested in healing, in helping people.  Music therapy seems a natural marriage of the two.  And since therapy has been an interest of mine for some time, this may be just the entrance I need into it.  I have a musical background, so I won’t feel like I’m diving into completely new territory.

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