Cross Communication: Trying to Find and Accept the Universe’s Plan for Me

"Advice Help Signpost" courtesy of Stuart Miles /
“Advice Help Signpost” courtesy of Stuart Miles /

I’ve been asking for guidance a lot lately from my spiritual guide(s).  I haven’t figured out how to communicate with them yet, though I still sometimes see them in my number combinations and hear them in the songs lyrics on the radio.

I feel like my heart and my mind are not lined up in what I want to do with my life, and I’m not sure exactly what to listen to.  Or how to listen, either.

Lately I’ve been losing tutoring students.  I was overwhelmed with students — freaking out and wanting a break — and now that I’ve gotten the break, I’m not taking it well.  I’m taking it as rejection or a sign of failure or a need to worry about money more.  I feel my spiritual guides must be frustrated with me. (Can they get frustrated?)  Here they are, giving me what I want, and I’m rejecting it!

Why am I here in the first place?   Why am I in this place at this time?  It is because I wasn’t happy.  Am I happy now?  Happier, yes.  But I think I’ve forgotten how to be happy lately.  I’ve forgotten how to just be.  To enjoy life.  To not become my job.  I am NOT my job.

It’s time to remember.

P.S. Spiritual guides; I’m sorry.  I do trust you.  Please continue to guide me.  I’ll try to listen better.

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