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The title of this post is borrowed from Martha Beck, author of Steering by StarlightI am grateful for Cindy Dove of Purposed Lives, for her continued coaching, and for introducing me to the works of Martha Beck.  I am excited to find my Stargazer. . .

I am half-way through Beck’s book, and I’ve begun thinking about some “lizard” comments that are keeping me stuck in the past and fearing the future.  Here are some throw-away ideas that I would like to identify (First, recognition!), matched up with some new affirmations:


I am not good enough.   I am more than good enough — I’m amazing!

I have to be miserable.  I can be happy and at peace in the present moment.

Work has to be hard. Things don’t have to be — and aren’t — as hard as I make them out to be.

Work has to be unenjoyable.  I can find fun and enjoyment in anything I do.  Or I can trick myself into making it not so bad!


I have to do this because this is what may family wants (parents, sister, grandparents, aunts & uncles, etc). What I do is inspired by my true self, and whatever I choose to do is acting in the best interests of my life purpose/path.

He can’t handle ___________ (my fiance, my father, etc), so I should/shouldn’t _____________. I give credit to ____________ for how strong they are, and I will let the butterfly make its own way out of the cocoon.

If people don’t come to my parties, that means they don’t like me. I give myself permission to choose not to go to events, and I give other people permission to not go to events.  It is not a reflection on my person or theirs.

If people aren’t calling me, that means they don’t like me.  If I feel a need to connect with someone, I will make the effort.  When they are ready to connect with me, they will do the same.

I am too shy to talk to people.  I have been told that I am a friendly, outgoing person, and I know it!

I have to prove myself for people to like me. I have gotten smiles from passerbys and people I have just met.

If I _________________/don’t do ________________, people won’t like me. I do not have control over how people feel toward me.  When I am aligning with my true self, I am at peace with myself and my choices and actions.


I can’t handle money. I have been managing money just fine for years now.

I have to pay off this mortgage as quickly as possible, even if it makes me miserable trying to do it. I am willing to take longer to pay off my mortgage, if it means I can work jobs that I love and live a happier life.

I need to make enough money to afford things that my friends afford and do things that my friends do. I am a frugal person who can find enjoyment in simple things.

It is good to feel poor and without. Though the simple life can be a fulfilling life, I do not need to deprive myself of everything to feel that I am being my best self.


I have to do things a certain way./Things must be a certain way. The possibilities are endless!

I must be a bad person. I am exactly who I a meant to be.

I can’t be completely, blissfully happy because that would be heaven, and I’m not ready to go yet. I can be completely, blissfully happy, as others are around me!

I’ll bet you can imagine how hard it was to type the opposite, my affirmations!  Am I going to magically change overnight?  That would be lovely!  But, however long it takes, the journey has begun.

What are your throw-away ideas?  What are your new affirmations?

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