This post isn’t really about minding “P”s and “Q”s. I forget what those even stand for. (Fighting the urge to go look that up on Wikipedia right now.)  Since the subject of today’s post is a little. . . delicate, I’m going to be a little vague in my labels.

I watched two documentaries on Netflix tonight because I wanted to become a little more open-minded about an area that interests my boyfriend, but makes me a little squeamish. Plus, it seemed a little sexy and dangerous, and I’d already had my rum and coke (our latest trend in sweet concoctions).

Needless to say, I don’t know if it was the alcohol or the content, but my light and juicy entertainment experience completely backfired. My roaring feminist screamed out of one side and my raving, vengeful shrew spewed out the other. I raged against the industry, was repulsed by the images I saw, cut down the women involved, and began hating men. (My poor boyfriend didn’t know what to do. He steered clear of my fiery eyes and later got frozen by the cold shoulder.)

All in all, I guess I can say I at least gained some insights from this experience:

  • I got a wake-up call that I’m a bit of a hypocrite. I tore into my boyfriend earlier this week for calling Adele a “cow” during our discussion about her latest Vogue cover (in his defense, he might have been drinking at the time), and tonight I was calling one of this evening’s stars a “pig”, referring to her plastic-surgery nose and other enhancements/detractments (in my defense . . . I was drinking at the time. . .) “At least Adele is real!” I spat confidently. But that’s hardly the point. A woman is a woman, and her body is her body, and it’s her business, and not really any of mine, right?
  • Now I know that I’m just not into it.  It repulses me.  I think it’s mainly because every time I think about it, my mind jumps to the hard stuff, and that material just seems so fake, rough, and really degrading toward women.
  • I’m amazed at how huge the industry is, low end all the way to high roller.  It’s truly a thriving business, and it’s so odd that it’s going on right out there, right in front of us, and no one really talks about it.  It sneaks past you on side-of-the-road highway signs.  It peeks out at you when you’re channel surfing in your hotel room.  It pops up at you when you’re surfing the Net.  You also might hear about it in the latest Hollywood or political scandal.  It comes up in a dirty joke or finds its way into the bedroom.

Even though I’m just not into it,  I’m still not sure how I feel about it morally.  On the one hand, I feel people have the freedom to do as they please, and my own feelings on the subject are really of no importance.  On the other hand I wonder: “Where does this all come from?”  Is this another example of men objectifying and subjugating women and society accepting it as the norm?  I mean, it was my boyfriend who remarked that this was all about men, wasn’t it?   No male actors/companions mentioned in these documentaries.  No men out on the streets, nor on a woman’s arm at a fancy dinner or social event.  Not even any surgically enhanced men on billboards or in movie scenes.   What about the relationships that are affected by men who try to turn fantasy into their reality?  And what about those who turn this secret life into a second life?  So, maybe I should I be angry, and I should want to do something about it.  Were my rantings justified?

Image: adamr /

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